Mouse fable

Mr. Mouse was quite lost. He needed to go home but it seemed the more he searched, the more lost he became.

Frustrated he asked one of the forest animals for help and they said why not ask the Cat for he knows the forest through and through. Mouse knew this was true, but cat also had a habit of eating mice, but yet, he had to get home. Could he trust Cat? So Mouse went to see Owl and asked what he thought of his plan. Owl hooted plaintively, "you must choose your friends wisely not all who offer help have your best interest at heart. Cat likes to eat and although the winter hasn't started yet and there is plenty of food, what makes you think he won't be hungry after so long a journey." Mouse replied "but I must go home. I must be home by winter or surely I will die." Owl hooted, "let me bring you home. But mouse was not convinced as he knew Owl too liked to eat mice and so he says and why wouldn't you eat me?" Owl says "because you are my friend". "Cat says he is my friend as well." Owl hooted, "but I have wings and can carry you home. "

Very frustrated at his lack of options mouse sits by the lake and cries. Rabbit comes up and asks him why his is making more water for the lake. Mouse explains "I must rely on those that want to eat me to take me home, but if I don't accept their help I will die from the winter so far from home because i am a mouse." "What does a mouse have to do with you dieing." "Well because I don't have wings, to see the entire forest, or long legs that will take me over stretches of land in a short time, I don't even have claws to defend myself." "And now I must die." "Well says Rabbit if you are decided then just do it quickly and stop sobbing." "Mouse moans but don't you see I don't want to die." "Well then you can use your strengths to help you out of your situation." "Strengths?..." he utters "But i have none. Do you not listen?" "Rabbit sighs patiently everyone has something, take that poor rock over their, it's no rock its turtle and his shell hides and protects him." "Then what do I have?" "I can't tell you what you have" says rabbit exasperated. "You must know what you have. You are a silly mouse" and with that rabbit hops off.

Later Mouse comes back to Owl and says "I accept your help to bring me home. How about tomorrow?" Owl accepts and the next day they meet. Owl holds little mouse in his claws and off they go till mouse sees his village and instructs owl to go down, but owl doesn't go down . Mouse cries pitifully. "Please let me see my village one last time if you are to eat me. Render me this promise you have made."

So Owl lowers down to the village when without warning cat jumps on his back. Mouse leaps away and says "I have no claws, beak or wings to defend me but I am cunning. I asked Cat to follow us and promised in return he would have something bigger to eat then myself." And off mouse ran into the night as both Cat and Owl sat mesmerized on how such a small mouse had fooled them and how quickly his tiny shape could disappear under the shadow of the evening.

Terribly Incompetent Employment Agency

There is this terribly incompetent employment agency (who had interviewed me at least 4 times and had tested me on computer skills for at at least 3 hours) and then later, much after having ignored me for 3 weeks, had called me concerning a job that i had already refused twice. Did they believe three times was lucky?

First the job opportunity was offered as a "temp", then it was presented to me again as a "temp to perm" and now recently it was re- re- presented to be as a "permanent and great job". What were they basing this phenomenal job rating on I am still unsure. In any case I thanked them as best as i could between clenched teeth and and told them that i had recently gained employment but that it was so nice that they thought of me yet once again. The agent seemed upset with me but seemed to be working hard not to show it, offered her congratulations with such a fake smile i could hear her foundation makeup crack under the phenomenal effort as she asked if my file should be removed from the active list. "Yes, please."

But no, no, nothing with these people can be that easy, for I received yet another call from the same agency. This time they had a "really great opportunity" for me. Wow, really? And they described what my unsavory task at said job would be without even coming up for air. You see the list was long. Apparently cloning would be essential. Oh and of course the boss was demanding. Translation: not someone you would want to work for and which in all likelihood would require that the average healthy person would need to go into therapy after a few months.

Finally after reciting this long list with apparently no commas, or periods, she asks if i would be interested in interviewing. I felt embarrassed to state the obvious that if I were to interview for this job it would have to be better then the job I was presently employed at. But apparently it was necessary as she didn't mention any reason why i would want to have this job which would be directly tied under the headings "income", "vacation", "health care" other "possible perks...."

There was a pause as if she is unsure what I am inquiring about.

Upset now at having to state the obvious in more detail and having to talk with this agency that I had already lost so much time previously with, I make a tremendous efforts to remain calm. "Yes, compensation." Why would I need to ask what the compensation is, does she think I work for pleasure and drop these checks in some paper recycling box on my way home? Isn't this the same compensation that she is expecting should the person hire me? Isn't this the same compensation that has instigated her to call me? She can't think I am desperate, I already have a job, wasn't that clear?

There is a pause and her voice sounds frustrated as she mutters "oh its about x to x amount depending on experience".

I tell her I am making approximately that amount where I am. How about vacation? She seems a little angry now....why? Is this not her job being the go between employer and potential employee? Shouldn't she know this information before calling especially as I am employed and it is difficult for me to make these type of phone calls about another job in my office?

She pauses again and lets me know with much irritation that she will need to contact the employer for that information. And now a longer pause. IS this a PAUSE in which she hopes I will say "no that's ok I will interview for this position regardless of pay and vacation?"

Instead I say "that's sounds good and can you please leave the information on my voice mail so that "we" (really meaning "I") don't have to play phone tag and I can make my decision as soon as possible. (doesn't logic stipulate that these aren't calls I want to be making in front of my colleagues or boss at my new job?) But so far logic hasn't played a very big part with my interaction with said employment agency.

She does call back the next day. "Hello this is L...., I have the information you needed please call me back."

I don't.

Ants

I am being quietly invaded by carpenter ants. It is war. They come out when they feel it is safe, when i am typing at my computer and they do not see much movement...they think i am busy and then they make a run for this corner or that corner and I have to grab what ever is near by, hopefully a napkin or something appropriate and smush it. At first I was squeamish gently pressing them with much disgust and a turned face but apparently their bodies are surprisingly resistance to this pressure or perhaps the amount of paper used cushions them....but as with all distasteful experience repetition makes us more resilient and perhaps crueler and I now press harder and look directly at the offending perpetrator.

And now because it is hot outside they are suddenly coming out in record number. I am not sure if they have some form of communication but they seem warier and quicker. It feels like like some sort of bad LSD experience and I jump at every black spot on the ground, or wist of hair which touches my neck.

I am going to buy poison.

This is war.

Poor Little Blog

Blogging is tougher then it looks. My poor little blog keeps slipping into oblivion and can't be found using Google and the few times in it which it can be found under Google....it is usually so far down on the page or pages no one will see it. Just as bad, is when it does appear occasionally with apparent reluctance, it doesn't show may latest post but some old post from another era as if I am not a conscientious blogger but some couch potatoe who is too lazy to pop open their laptop and feed it. This is a very unfair portrayal of my situation as i do care and i do try to blog at least once a week and am pretty successful in my attempts at frequency.

If any one can see me and is reading this please help. Any suggested advice or website concerning this issue would by very appreciated and will be followed up with visits and comments of your blog should you have one!

A Small Doodle Really

I have only been at my job for a month when i think I have already made a little error, which I am sure they will believe is a lot bigger then just little, but as it is their company, they of course have the final judgement call, so I suppose we can just call the error a big error. I was putting together a boardroom booklet with minutes and it was the first time i saw such ridiculously mindless documents. Which all began to look the same but which never the less had to be placed in a precise order. This seemed fine and all except I do not what basis they use to decide the sequence of the order. So when my manager with very limited time sat down with me and shuffled the pages until he found this order which he understood but did not share the logic of with I. I thought it was very clever of me to number said pages with a #2 yellow pencil as these documents were still being worked on and the fear was that they could unintentionally become disordered again. Mind you I had an eraser handy at my desk I planned to use on them before sending them out.

It was quite a shock to me when I was binding these documents and noticed my little number marks on the ends of these very official but terribly boring documents like a child's disobedient scribble on a perfectly pristine wall. Increasing my misfortune was the fact that though they were written in such a light pencil marks as to be barley noticeable, they were were now made much darker by our evil and terribly disloyal copier machine. Of course this was only noticed by myself when I was putting together the last book and my manger was waiting with an outstretched hand to gather the booklets to make his London flight.

I don't touch my pencils at my desk they stare at me guiltily.

Moth

Moth liked to fly at night. It’s cool out at night and there is no bright sun to burn his eyes and singe his wings. This was until he came upon a candle light and so fond of the little light which wasn’t as bold and brash as the sun he inched over to explore.

The other moths warned…noooo….everyone who goes there dies in the flame… so Moth flew off but watched the flickering light from afar in the dark.

Drawn to it he moves closer and flies around and feels it’s comforting warmth, each times inching closer until ouch to close, it’s true what they say it does burn he thinks. But so nice is the swaying light and the warmth that a little closer could be ok. Yes quite nice Moth thinks. So nice and white it makes me glow.

Mesmerized he can no longer leave the light but swims back and forth closer each time till his emotions get the better of him and he dashes madly off in the center because he can no longer bear to be any further.

Caught!

Because I speak French I can eavesdrop on them, which is easy to do because they believe they are the only ones in the area to understand the language and so they speak freely, intimately, and without reserve. It was because of this that I once shared an elevator with a a young couple who were discussing how they could cheat on their taxes. Surprised, I turn around to get a closer look at them but my face must of seemed too alert for the casual glance i had thought I was mastering, their eyes widened in response like scared owls and they whispered for the remaining floors.

Ladybug

I came out of my air conditioned tower of lifeless air, lifeless thought, lifeless work. The ice resides in my bones and it take minutes for the sun to seep in. I sat down on the warm steps and watch hoards of people move through the tight sidewalks. After having finished my lunch hour i put my bag to my shoulder and collect my jacket to notice a small lady bug vanishing up one of the sleeves. "oh no my friend, where I go you will not survive" and i gently remove her by allowing her to climb up my finger and place her on the leaf of a near by plant. Freedom awaits at least one of us.

Undesirable Bubble Effect

I took the subway, which was packed, which is ok, because it was peak, and peak is always packed but then came in this trashy girl with a huge flower tattoo sitting above her but (which we all had a nice view of due to her extremely low cut jean), super oiled up hair, fleshy protruding stomach, person, who casually leans against the holding pole while dropping a dirty tissue.

No one can now hold the pole, nor do they seem inclined to tell her that no one can hold the poll if she leans against it, so instead they stretch their hands up above her oil ridden hair. There is bubble around her from people avoiding her as much as possible even though every square inch of the car is densely packed.

She is a living billboard screaming: I have no respect for myself, have every STD known to man kind and I am familiar with jail and prostitution. We are all thinking the same thing as we are jostled to and fro from the many stops and starts of the subway while cautiously maintaining the bubble. When is she getting off?

When off she goes... and in enters a fresh set of people who go for the area on the pole that we still refuse to touch when a girl says "ew, that's oily".

I mentally make a note to avoid places on the subway that seem strangely vacant when a car is so packed. It's the undesirable bubble effect.