Sunday, April 15, 2007

Employed Again

My short lived stint of self-employment as a translator has now officially ended. I am now "gainfully employed" (cheers in the background - "Go Girl, Go Girl")

After many disturbing and disastrous interviews and poor offers, I have finally made my way into the industry that I had been looking to enter which is finance - check.

I have the ballpark salary I was aiming for - check.

The position is promising - check.

The position offers growth and the company is growing - check.

The people seem nice and down to earth - check.

It's as if all my checklist have been covered and all my wishes have been granted so now why do i feel so wistful? Why this lingering doubt? The grey cloud?

As much as this period of interview and endless searching felt demoralizing it also had a flavor of hope that all my efforts towards employment were refused or deemed unworthy by me so that i could maintain my course of self employment to eventually become a full time writer. I could end up writing the next Harriet Potter book and move to London where my writing would be aided by the cities rainy weather and a warm fireplace in a cosy flat. Not an apartment, a flat, like the British have and in my closets there would be many beautiful long raincoats which I would swirl around the city and sit in warm cafe in watching the rain. With this occupation I would travel to see my family as often as i feel like. I would take long trips by train and work on the move glancing at the countryside flying by my window while tapping away at my laptop.

Instead, on Monday morning at 7:00 AM I will be waiting on the platform for the LIRR to take me Manhattan in corporate attire where upon arrival at Penn station, I will board the bleak looking E line to my stop at Lexington. In this area I will walk to my office and work from 9 to 5.

Still, I have a laptop and my ambition, and with these as the British say I will "press on".

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